The Scottish, it seems, like a flutter and unbeknown to me it may be the result of my association with Scottish lads whilst studying at Edinburgh University that has left me incapable of seeing a weekend of football go by without paying a visit to our pal William Hill. But can you blame me? The whole weekend comes alive! One knows that putting a bet on 15 games that could turn 1 pound into 1000 is less than likely to yield anything; but the sheer excitement and boisterous aura that fills a room of lads watching football at a weekend, constantly pulling out paper coupons, shouting to each other across the room to check the scores in any which way, phone or laptop, is infectious. How do you find the results of the Uruguayan second division anyway? Who cares, it’s the fun rather than the end result that is what draws me to it. And contrary to my mum’s belief it is not an illness and loan sharks are not currently hunting me down; if I can budget 4 quid for a ten pack of fags each week, I can manage a couple of quid for accumulators each weekend.
The thing is, however, that winning does happen. Last march 14 boys and I went to Dublin for St Paddys Day and it was an experience to say the least, an experience one my good friends Gogs would have missed had it not been for our good friend William Hill. A couple of weeks before we left, skint and tired of hearing us plan our Guinness based antics, Gogs turned 5 quid into 1800. That was Dublin taken care of – with a couple of bottles of champagne to boot. Aside from that another friend of mine saw a goal in the 94th minute turn his solitary pound coin into 1000. Can you imagine the feeling? My biggest win is turning 5 into 180 and my closest call saw Inter Milan lose to Udinese at home and consequently be the 1 game out of 18 to thwart my attempts to magic 1600 pounds from just 1. (The image below should act as proof enough!) But there we go, that’s how the game works, it was that one pound that went into the bookies pocket. It was also that one pound, having brought me so close, that has seen me lose a little heavier than usual over recent times as my new found confidence proved to be misplaced. That, at the end of the day, is why bookies drive fast cars and smoke cigars.
I like to think I have a grand plan, keep these little bets going until I finally win that one jack pot, that one big one and then cut and run, never to return. That’s the plan anyway – it remains to be seen. Could I really watch a weekend’s football with nothing riding on it again? I’ve got to stop losing first, and then we’ll see.
There, I bet that got your attention. Hate is a strong word at the best of times but when used to describe your feelings towards one of the worlds most respected footballers the sentiment is even more shocking, and as a result the statement needs some elaboration.
The reasoning behind this ill feeling comes from what is becoming a long-fought issue in the media; are professional footballers sportsmen in its purest form or are they role models for the wider community? To my mind there is a split of opinion amongst the media with some wanting to restrict conversation and discussion to matters of football only, whilst others jump at any opportunity to lambast any minor indiscretion a footballer makes off the pitch. A decision needs to be made, it may well be true that footballers themselves do not want the responsibility of being a role model, they want to play football and live their lives as they wish, but is that ok? Football is their profession, how many of those in a regular occupation have responsibilities that they would rather not deal with? To my mind being in the spotlight, as part of the modern game, comes with the territory and that must be a consideration of those who make it to the top of the game.
The reason this issue has forced itself to the forefront of my mind is the treatment of Ryan Giggs following his affair. To understand my issue, however, one must understand my points of comparison and those are the ever-fiery Wayne Rooney, the laughable Peter Crouch and the antithesis of gentlemanly conduct that is John Terry. All four have played away from home but their consequent treatment by the footballing community and the media varied an unbelievable amount.
Crouchy, bless him, got off relatively lightly, I think through surprise more than anything else. By his own admission without his footballing status he may well still be a virgin, but instead he has managed to start a family with a beautiful blonde that puts to shame most other WAGs. Why he did it no one will ever know and it may be a sense of pity that he came so close to throwing it all away, by his own stupidity, that led people to feel sorry for him? Who knows?
Rooney did not fair so well. Photographers invaded his privacy for months following his indiscretion and the details of the sordid affair, including its unfortunate timing, were spread for all to read. The qualities of his footballing performances were tied into discussions of his personal life and his shame was well known. However, what called his position as a role model into question more, his affair or his swearing down the camera to audiences watching at home? In my opinion it was the latter. Match of the Day was filled with discussions of whether his behavior was acceptable and whilst some footballing purists attempted to put it down to his ‘fiery character’ and the emotion of the game, many criticized Rooney’s disregard for all those his actions may well influence at home.
John Terry has lost his England captaincy twice, firstly for an affair with his ex-best friend’s wife and secondly for allegedly racially abusing Anton Ferdinand. Now, again, which one got the most publicity? Rightly so, the issue of racism created a huge stir throughout British football and I think the amount of commotion that followed this incident, and that involving Suarez, served as an excellent advertisement of the anti-racism campaign in England, which shames the likes of Russia. Within Terry’s affair however, what gained the most publicity, the fact he had cheated on his wife or that Wayne Bridge refused to shake his hand? I hope the pattern of my argument is gradually beginning to emerge, that there are so many instances in which footballers as role models are called into question, but sexual promiscuity does not seem to be one.
Ryan Giggs committed an unfathomably foul act by having an affair with his brother’s wife, whilst married himself, and if reports are to be believed, he still refuses to apologise. This was not a heat of the moment decision inspired by the emotions of a football match this was a subversive and calculated series of decisions that continued over the space of years and culminated in the termination of an unborn child. Maybe it was the specter of the failed injunction or maybe it was the fact no one could quite believe the yoga-loving, fame shy Manchester United ace could do such a thing, but the issue seemed to come and go with little incident to the man himself. Giggs’ name was not dragged through the mud and the likes of Lineker, Hansen and Lawrenson continued to sing the praises of Giggs for his footballing qualities, not once was his position as a role model called into question.
The only answer that seems to present itself is that in the footballing world, ones private life, no matter how public, is off limits. No matter how public the press makes a footballer’s indiscretions the fact it can still be loosely termed as part of their ‘personal life’ means that the term role model is no longer applicable. I don’t think, in this time of an access-all-areas media that this distinction can be made because the image it sends is one that; with the riches and fame of football one is able to become a moral degenerate and get away with it. If one is able to sleep with whoever they want and still be praised incessantly for being able to play at the highest level on the brink of 40 then something is drastically wrong.
I am not the kind of person who complains about Jeremy Clarkson or the titles of Channel 4 programs, I just want someone to come out and openly criticize Giggs for being, quite simply, a terrible human being. In 2009 Giggs won the Sports Personality of the Year award and every one applauded that the quiet and unassuming man had finally got his time in the spotlight, and yet when Giggs’ time for the spotlight truly came no one had the conviction to really press him and I think that is a shame. The award is not for sportsman of the year it is for their personality and the fact the award was not rescinded, I think, is a travesty.
Whether their profession defines them as role models or not, it places footballers in the spotlight for their actions both on and off the pitch. As a result I hope that at some point, as much as their successes bring them applause that their failures bring them hardship in all aspects of their lives. Ryan Giggs is an exceptional footballer but is that alone enough to earn ones respect? Not in my case it isn’t.
As part of my application to earning a work placement over the summer I was asked to carry out a couple of exercises. These involved: choosing 5 people I would like to feature in an issue, how I would like them shot and what questions i would ask them, together with creating my own version of FHM's Final Countdown section - previous titles of which have been '10 things you only do to impress women' and '9 things that no man looks good doing'.
The 5 people I chose to interview were: Tom Hardy, Skream and Benga, Irina Shayk, Kevin Bridges and Mila Kunis. The title I chose for my own Final Countdown was ’9 Ways You Know You’ve Had a Good Night Out (Without Actually Remembering Anything)’
Playing on the contrast between his old bad-boy life style and now that of a film star, create a contrast within the picture. Have him shot in the same pose with one hand reaching out but in 2 different scenarios. In the one instance he is dressed in a tux surrounded by flashing lights in a ‘red carpet’ setting and his hand is out stretched to shake hands / sign autographs. In the second picture he is in the same pose but this time dressed ruggedly with a derelict urban background and his hand is this time reaching out to break into a car. Final shot Hardy in a tux with a gorgeous girl on each arm, in his immediate vicinity it’s a vividly colored red carpet setting with flashing lights that gradually fades out into a dreary super imposed urban background.
Questions:
As the Batman villain there are going to be comparisons between Bane and the late Heath Ledger’s Joker. Has this brought an added dimension of pressure?
Bane has been very successfully shrouded in secrecy, by now are you not itching to just get it out there and see people’s reactions?
Hollywood is a very Ameri-centric community. Is that difficult as a Brit? Is there pride in carrying the British standard - along with all the other British talent – in such a tough environment?
Talk us through your appearance on Johnathan Ross and his release of that fantastic footage of you? How pissed off were you really? Had it not been for the protection of national television would Johnathan have a black eye?
Your new film ‘This Means War’ is a more light-hearted approach than we are accustomed to seeing from you. What was more fun: beating up Chris Pine? Or snogging Reese Witherspoon?
Theme coincides with their upcoming tour of America and the rise of the music genre Dubstep in America. Idea is to link it to ‘Cool-Britannia’ / Beatlemania – esque. Black and White photos, having the pair dressed in suits coming out of the plane door with turntables or some DJ equipment under their arms. Then a shot of a crowd of waiting girls dressed in 60s style with placards and a girl fainting in the foreground. Also have them suited crossing the road as in the Beatles Abbey Road picture.
Questions:
Some artists dream of having a single song break America – how does it feel to have pioneered an entire genre that has taken the States by storm?
Skream how has it been becoming a father? Benga – how has it affected Skream - has he been tamed?
Summer is coming up, which means its festival season. What have you got planned? Anymore streaking for you Benga? I remember that from Benicassim 2010!
How annoyed do you guys get with all the forum and youtube comments about ‘What is Dubstep’ etc? Has it split the artist community like its split the fans?
Finally, as a couple of London boys how are you looking forward to the Olympics? Has Boris approached you to do a set in the Opening Ceremony?
Link to relationship with Ronaldo. Firstly picture her in the changing room getting dressed into sexy sports wear with other girls in the background. Next is Irina out on the pitch. Pictured about to take a free kick mirroring the exact stance Ronaldo takes before a free kick. Then finally back in the changing room with a communal shower setting with Irina in the foreground and other girls behind. Steam from shower in the places of their underwear.
Questions:
A Sports Illustrated cover girl and the most expensive footballer of all time, it sounds too good to be true. How did that happen? Who chased whom?
Who spends more time in the mirror, you or Cristiano?
Is it true your pet dog Caesare is related to the lead in Marley and Me? (Not Jennifer Aniston!)
What was a more proud moment in your life - reaching the cover of Sports Illustrated or being crowned Miss Chelyabinsk 2004?
You’re not the usual WAG we have come to expect Irina, you do a lot of charity work too, tell us about that?
Kevin’s comedy revolves around being a normal guy making funny observations. So shoot him as a normal guy with fame as an after thought. In a series of photos first start with him at a grimey crap house party with a dull background lots of people drinking WKD and him in casual clothes. Next him sat on the bus in a bedraggled suit, burger in one hand whilst checking his watch on the other as if in a rush. Lastly a split page. On one half the camera shoots him from the front he is dressed and presented immaculately on stage in bright lights. Then on the other half page the reverse - shot from behind -looking out into a sea of people all crying with laughter.
Questions:
Your comedy is often stories from you growing up, based on anecdotes, for a change up of stlye can you please tell FHM your best knock-knock joke?
How do you find the difference between English and Scottish crowds? Is it difficult to translate things that are specific to Glasgow in to a wider audience?
How are you enjoying the world of celebrity? James Corden used it to successfully befriend Becks, have you got any similar plans?
Has the added spotlight helped you out with the ladies at all or has that never been a problem?
Glasgow has a reputation for being rough, is it warranted? What’s the most stereotypically Glaswegian thing you have ever seen?
